Just a Letter.

It’s just a letter.

It’s just a letter I need to write

Just a letter, written in fading light

Just so you know, a means to an end

But not a letter I’ll need to send.

Just a letter because I need to rest

Just a letter to say I tried my best

Trying so hard to find a way to stay

But I can’t be here just to be your yesterday.

Lend me your your eyes so I can see

With borrowed eyes, what you’ll miss in me.

Just a letter written in pain

Just a letter, an attempt to explain

Just a letter that’s left behind.

I’m really sorry, but it’s just a letter you’ll have to find.

Now for the very few of my family and “friends” who bother to read my meanderings (are you actually still there?) No this isn’t a suicide note from me (sorry to disappoint), it’s just something I wrote in one of my darker moments, whilst thinking about somebody that took her own (very young) life. The second to last thing she ever did was to write a suicide note, explaining how sorry she was for what she was about to do. So in the midst of so much pain she couldn’t live anymore, she was still thinking about other people, the measure of a truly kind person.

So when you hear people say how a suicide victim (and yes, they are victims) took the “easy way out” try to imagine how much pain they were in, so much pain that they couldn’t live anymore. I’m sorry but I don’t have the answers, I wish I did. I can’t even help myself, never mind other people, and again I’m sorry I wish I could.

That’s it for this post, perhaps a little darker than normal but there we are.

Take care people.

To anyone who’s had suicidal thoughts, I’m glad you’re still here, keep holding on.

Chester Bennington.

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